I've concluded that the notion of something inspiring growth in me is not a sufficient enough reason in it's own right for me to embrace it.
The relevant questions are:
"How will this make me grow..?"
"In what direction..?"
"Is that direction harmonious with my desired outcome..?"
My life has little sense of direction in spite of my passion and potential to grow.
I've figuratively become entangled in my own offshoots.
As such my posture has simply been pulled to the ground; rather than free to ever shoot relatively upward.
I must free my self of the agenda to grow for the sake of it;
and rather focus entirely on where it is I intend to be.
For all direction will be challenge;
but only that which is congruent with my purpose will be rewarding enough that consistency therein could be sustained.
Thence forth I vow never to willingly invest even a modicum of energy in any thing that I've not discerned will move me personally closer to my desired outcome.
When the world is mostly directed by mindless peer-consensus... adaptation to such for the sake of growing beyond ego is not the growth I need.
My ego is the tool my Father has given for autonomy from such mundane madness.
My ideal growth is that of my ego against the gravitational pull of lowest common-denomination asininity.
With said strength I'll no longer feel a need to conflict with said inane aspects of reality.
I will simply have the capacity to tranquilly standfast in the midst; like a supple branch: not even having the need to be rigid; but that doesn't mean I need to seek alignment with them for hypothetical sake of said growth.
I just need to focus on the desired outcome;
And my proper relationship to the rest of reality will take care of it self.